Singles chalkboard: Haste, waste or wait.

Hey there BCU Family!

As usual, you have the option of listening to our podcast (click the BCU avatar below to listen), reading the notes or BOTH. In any case, we pray the podcast blesses you. If so, please thumbs up or leave a comment! Thank you and enjoy your study!

Years ago, I was talking with a lady who has gotten married for the first time in her 40’s! Like how awesome is that?! When speaking about her hubby, I expected to hear all the wonderful (ok…and maybe some trying) things that happen in a new marriage, but with a positive overall outlook. Instead, my heart wept as she recounted some troubling issues and wondered aloud about the hasty decision-making process leading up to the nuptials. Eventually the union ended up in a nasty divorce.

Don’t I know about making unwise and quick decisions! In some cases, I needed to work a little overtime to cover those decisions, but in other cases, my heart suffered as well as my “spiritual bottom” in getting chastened from the Lord.

As the Lord is blessing me to mature more in Him, I found that running ahead of God’s timing and getting  in His permissive will (versus His divine will) causes unneeded stress, heartache and suffering. David reminds us the steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord, (Psalms 37:23 (a) and many times those steps may lead us in a direction of waiting. In this “microwave” society we live in, even as people of God, we often veer off the ordered path in lieu of a shiny-“Mr.-Right-Now” blessing. While God does work suddenly and will guide you to some relationships, in many cases we need time to check him out to see if the “blessing” is a possible curse.

*Sister Lola met brother Mark who claimed salvation and loved to worship in the house of God, yet resorted to unholy and vile name calling when he didn’t get his way. Lola terminated the relationship. When confiding to a friend as to why she cut the relationship off, Friend said, “oh he didn’t mean it, he was just upset. HELLO?! If he’s acting like that NOW, and claims to be Holy Ghost filled, how much more can that escalate later on towards her or possible future children? Physical abuse? Thank God she rejected the unwise counsel from friend and is waiting for whoever God has for her.

What about how he treats his mom or sisters? Rachelle met Erick and it was love almost instantly. She noticed a little, no a LOT of friction between him and his sister, but who doesn’t have a little sibling rivalry, right? Turns out in a fit of anger years prior, Erick hurled an ash tray at his sister’s face, permanently scarring her and she only spoke  with him on an as needed basis.  Even with this knowledge, Rachelle continued in the relationship, only to experience years of mental and physical torment. Rachelle finally got the courage to leave Erick, and repair her brokeness through the healing blood of Jesus Christ and salvation.

Leesa’s relationship with Dean developed after a short friendship. Dean was smart, successful and loved the Lord. As they were getting to know one another, Dean lost some money when the stock market crashed. He was so upset about it, he stopped speaking to Leesa for months. This pattern continued one form or another when there were unexpected bills that came about. As they eventually ended the relationship, Dean angrily commented, “all that money I spent [on you].”

While everyone is at a different place in their spiritual walk and growth must be allowed for, there are some situations God just warns us to stay away from, as they are not His intent for us. However, we are occasionally to lured to AND stay in these relationships thinking we can “help” the person, listening to those well-meaning, but wrong family or church members, or we settling out of fear and worry that no one else will be around for a while or ever. But our God loves us SO much He truly wants to bless us with our hearts’ desires as we delight ourselves in Him (Psalms 37:4) while we wait! WHEW! What an assurance, BCU Family!

“If you go outside of the will of God to get something, you have to stay out of the will of God to keep it.”

Matthew 7:10 reminds us that we, being as evil as we are, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!  We may need to wait it out, but knowing that we’ll get God’s best is ABSOLUTELY worth it! By His grace, let’s stay in God’s divine will–and follow the steps He orders, so we are in position to get His best!

What are you thoughts about waiting? Have you ever run ahead of what God told you to do? How did it work out? Please head down to the comments section to share your thoughts so we can continue our conversation!

In the meantime, if you have not subscribed to BlenCouragesU.com, please do so! It’s free and a good place to get the encouragement, inspiration and information based the Word of God! Additionally, you can also see what we are up to on Facebook, Twitter,  and Instagram,  You can also listen in and subscribe to the podcast on Stitcher Radio , Google Play, and Apple podcasts!

Thank you SO much for stopping by. God bless, keep and make His face to shine upon you as you #StayOnTheWall!

Love,

BCU

*Names have been changed to protect the identities of persons involved.

Rats, Turkeys and Fruit…

 

Hey family!

Be Jive Turkey free!

Summer is fast approaching and in all the sunshine and excitement of the season, we still need to be prayerful and on high turkey alert! I learned a little more about turkeys from rats. Let me  “‘splain.”

I was flipping channels awhile back and caught a show called Rat Wars. It was a show about a New York City exterminator, who was ridding the Big Apple of these pesky rodents, who in some cases had overtaken the homes and businesses of some of his clients.  The guy mentioned that rats were smart creatures, and I thought “yeah, right”. But he was right!

Yep, I am smart~Trust!

What happened was, the exterminator set traps and noticed just a few of the rats were caught. Reason? He said some of the rats watched the others go to the traps and get caught/killed. The rats who stood by were astute enough to know to avoid the trap! If a creature that God made who hasn’t attended a day of school, nor have the Holy Ghost as a guide, knows to watch and avoid entrapment, how much better can we do? I’m just saying……Ok, keep that in mind and read on.

In my travels a few years ago, I met up with a dude in whom we had mutual acquaintances. We got to talking about the folks we knew and life in general, so I mentioned about being my saved, etc. Bozo did inform me that church girls were “easy to get with”–something about desperation and some other monkeyshine not worth repeating.  I don’t know how he thought his statements were attractive, but I was as hot as a freshly lit firecracker!  The truth is either he had that experience or was conducting a test. Either way, I know I wasn’t about to become a case study for Dr. Strangelove!!  If you really want to get to know someone, let them talk–God will let you know what’s up! What’s in the heart comes out of the mouth (Matthew 15:18).

Next is the saved-looking fruit. I notice, is that once we ID the fruit we like, we immediately hook up. “Oh well, there’s a saved-looking pear, that’s the one for me!”  Don’t misunderstand me, if one person is saved, the other NEEDS the Holy Ghost, no doubt. Salvation does not equal compatibility or God’s will.  Experience has taught me there is value in taking your time and developing a friendship based on mutual interests, experiences, goals and values. It’s also important to see where you differ and how negotiable those areas are. This way, if it is not God’s will for you to be together, you hear and see with a clear heart, rather than with a heart that has developed feelings and rationalization. I also believe that in the end, you will remain friends with no hard feelings or unforgiveness.

A former post I wrote about women not being the “low-lying fruit”,  got a little attention from a couple of guys I’m cool with on Facebook.  One young man who had his share of the easy fruit, said that eating fruit off the ground  “can make you sick”.  I didn’t think about that at the time I wrote it, but its true. Many times the fruit that’s just laying on the ground,  although convenient, is overripe, worm-ridden, bug-filled, spotty and rotten.  Sometimes women even go and pick the fruit, (rather than waiting to be picked). How did that work out for you?

Whether you are the low-branch fruit or pick it up, it may fill you up for now, but give you a bellyache, long-term illness or even death! As we mature, it’s important to recognize foolish behavior and correct it immediately. Do not pick off the tree! Didn’t we learn from Eve? LOLOLOL! Seriously, it’s better to wait and be picked properly. Proverbs says 9:6 Forsake the foolish and live; and go in the way of understanding. Why willingly die of from an avoidable case of “foolish”?

The bottom line:  I know there are some fantastic, stand-up guys out there—I am friends with quite a few and look forward to meeting more as my life progresses. In the spirit of watchfulness, the Bible says to watch and pray…(Matt 26:41) AND that you will know folks by their fruit (Matt 7). If it looks like a grape, yet talks thorns, then something is amiss. No matter how many grapes you thought you saw or have continuously look for, it’s a thorn bush. Pray for God’s divine (not permissive) will to be done and clarity in your thoughts and decision making so the decks are clear for your real blessing!

Thanks for reading and be blessed!

Love,

~Blen

Jive Turkey pic: http://www.newsrealblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/jiveTurkey.png

Rats pic: http://www.show31.com/2012/04/20-amazing-facts-about-rats.html