hurt – BCU

Cut-off Culture | Michele L. Perry

Hey there BCU Fam!

Because of the informal format, please tune into the podcast recording (click here or on the BCU avatar below) and refer to the written post for the highlights. We pray the post blesses and encourages you. If so, please thumbs up AND leave a comment! Thank you and enjoy the post!

Podcast highlights:

“Cut-off culture” is a relatively new phrase, but not a new phenomenon.
Basically, when someone offends you, cut-off culture says stop dealing with the person immediately and permanently.
This mindset is contrary to the Word of God and should be avoided as a way to handle all offenses.
A friend of mine, Michele L. Perry, spoke about this attitude in a post about a conversation she had with her late father.

BlenCouragesU · BCU Podcast | Cut-off Culture | Michele Perry | (Ep 313)

Scripture references:

Matthew 5:43-48

⁴³Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy.

⁴⁴But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;

⁴⁵That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.

⁴⁶For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? do not even the publicans the same?

⁴⁷And if ye salute your brethren only, what do ye more than others? do not even the publicans so?

⁴⁸Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.

Proverbs 3:5-6

⁵Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.

⁶In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

Ephesians 4:31-32

³¹Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:

³²And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.

BCUFam, we thank the Lord for Michele and sharing her story so that we can stay away from participating in this cut-off culture that is so prevalent right now. The Lord knew that we would be offended by people, so He gave us the blueprint as to how to handle it—we go to the person and talk to them about it (see Matthew 18:15). By doing things God’s way, we will get perfect [however God works it out] results. Amen? Amen! Let’s pray!

Father, in the name of Jesus, as we come before You today, we thank You for coming by with a Word to encourage us to examine ourselves. We thank You for helping us to see any lack of forgiveness, or patterns of cancelling people, in any relationships that we have, and helping us to choose to walk out Ephesians 4:32, where we are commanded to be kind, forgiving and tender-hearted toward one another.

Bless us to remember that You have forgiven us, so we want to continue forgive others. Thank You for the victory in this area, so we are without spot, wrinkle or blemish, and You are glorified in our lives, in Jesus name, we pray, Amen.

As a reminder, if you have not subscribed to BlenCouragesU.com, please do so! It’s free and a good place to get the encouragement, inspiration and information based the Word of God! Additionally, you can also see what we are up to on Facebook, X, and Instagram.

Also, if you so inclined, join us for our Thursday Night Bible Study––we are LIVE on YouTube 8:05EST/7:05CST. You can also listen in and subscribe to the podcast on whatever platform BCU is available on. Some of those platforms are Amazon Music, AnchorFm, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, iHeart Radio, Spotify, Stitcher Radio , and many more of your favorite podcast platforms!

Thank you SO much for stopping by! May God bless, keep and make His face to shine upon you as you #StayOnTheWall!

Love,

BCU

19 Sep 2023

BlenCouragesULeave a comment

And just WHY do we need to forgive?!

[Hey 👋🏾 there BCU Family!

Typically, you have the option of listening to our podcast, reading the notes or both. For this post, because of the conversational story, please tune into the podcast recording and refer to the written post for the highlights and corresponding Scriptures. We pray the post blesses and encourages you. If so, please thumbs up AND leave a comment! Thank you and enjoy the post!

My pastor often says that the number one sin among believers is not forgiving someone. And I have to admit, BCU Fam is one of the HARDEST things to do, especially with repeat offenders and those who have really hurt us badly, as we talked about last time we were together. Despite the forgiveness struggle, we need to forgive with the help of the Lord. Let’s jump into our second and final part of the series.

Podcast highlights:

Offenses will come..and ANYONE we come in contact with is subject to offending us.
In many things we offend all. This means while we may get offended, we offend others.
When we forgive, we MUST do it from the heart—once and for all.
Sources vary a bit, but on average, ten thousand talents equates to several million dollars in American money (USD). One hundred pence is about $17.00 USD.
Forgiveness is a part of the Christian walk. And required in order to get forgiveness from God.

Scripture references

Woe unto the world because of offenses! for it must needs be that offenses come; but woe to that man by whom the offence cometh! (Matthew 18:7).

Matthew 18:21-35

21 Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times?

22 Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, until seventy times seven.

23 Therefore is the kingdom of heaven likened unto a certain king, which would take account of his servants.

24 And when he had begun to reckon, one was brought unto him, which owed him ten thousand talents.

25 But forasmuch as he had not to pay, his lord commanded him to be sold, and his wife, and children, and all that he had, and payment to be made.

26 The servant therefore fell down, and worshipped him, saying, Lord, have patience with me, and I will pay thee all.

27 Then the lord of that servant was moved with compassion, and loosed him, and forgave him the debt.

28 But the same servant went out, and found one of his fellow servants, which owed him an hundred pence: and he laid hands on him, and took him by the throat, saying, Pay me that thou owest.

29 And his fellow servant fell down at his feet, and besought him, saying, Have patience with me, and I will pay thee all.

30 And he would not: but went and cast him into prison, till he should pay the debt.

31 So when his fellow servants saw what was done, they were very sorry, and came and told unto their lord all that was done.

32 Then his lord, after that he had called him, said unto him, O thou wicked servant, I forgave thee all that debt, because thou desiredst me:

33 Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellowservant, even as I had pity on thee?

34 And his lord was wroth, and delivered him to the tormentors, till he should pay all that was due unto him.

35 So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.

Forgiveness is a tough subject, BCU Fam, yet something that all of us (especially believers) need to apply with God’s help. The Scriptures are clear that if we don’t forgive, we don’t GET forgiven! Who wants to miss Heaven over that? No one does! Let’s take the people, situations and pain to Jesus and allow Him to heal us. I am a witness He will make you as good as new—even better!

So, what is your forgiveness story? How long did you hold on to the offense? What prompted you to let go? Or are you still holding it? Please has down to the comment section here on the BCU site, where we can continue our conversation!

In the meantime, if you have not subscribed to BlenCouragesU.com, please do so! It’s free and a good place to get the encouragement, inspiration and information based the Word of God! Additionally, you can also see what we are up to on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and YouTube! You can also listen in and subscribe to the podcast on Stitcher Radio , Google Play, and Apple podcasts!

Thank you SO much for stopping by. God bless, keep and make His face to shine upon you as you #StayOnTheWall!

Love,

BCU

22 Jan 20181 May 2018

BlenCouragesU5 Comments

Forgiveness: Do you trust God with your pain?

Hey 👋🏾 there BCU Family!

Last time we were together, we talked through a situation where I was betrayed and hurt by people whom I loved and trusted—and more importantly the lessons that the Lord taught me through what happened. A central theme of the podcast, is forgiveness from the heart. This, BCU Fam is one of the HARDEST things to do, especially with repeat offenders and those who have really hurt us badly. Yet, we need to forgive with the help of the Lord. Listen in to part 1 of this 2 part series and and find out why.

Podcast highlights:

Offenses will come..and ANYONE we come in contact with is subject to offending us.
In many things we offend all. This means while we may get offended, we offend others.
Forgiveness is a part of the Christian walk. And required in order to get forgiveness from God.

Scripture references

Woe unto the world because of offenses! for it must needs be that offenses come; but woe to that man by whom the offence cometh! (Matthew 18:7).

Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, until seventy times seven (Matthew 18:21-22).

For in many things we offend all. If any man offend not in word, the same is a perfect man, and able also to bridle the whole body (James 3:2).

And if the righteous scarcely be saved, where shall the ungodly and the sinner appear? (I Peter 4:18).

Forgiveness is a tough subject, BCU Fam, yet something that all of us (especially believers) need to apply with God’s help. Many years ago, the Lord even impressed on me to forgive someone who, through inaction, hurt many family members, years after the person has passed away. Without the prompting of the Lord, I would never have realized I was holding the individual in a non-forgiving state. Who wants to miss Heaven over that? No one does! Let’s take the people, situations and pain to Jesus and allow Him to heal us. I am a witness He will make you as good as new—even better!

Lord will, next time we’re together we’ll finish up the podcast by going over the remainder of Matthew 18 and applying it to our lives. In the meantime, tell us your forgiveness story. How difficult was it? How long did you hold on to the offense? What prompted you to let go? Or are you still holding it? There’s a comment section here on the BCU site, where we can continue our conversation!

In the meantime, if you have not subscribed to BlenCouragesU.com, please do so! It’s free and a good place to get the encouragement, inspiration and information based the Word of God! Additionally, you can also see what we are up to on Facebook, Twitter , Instagram, and YouTube! You can also listen in and subscribe to the podcast on Stitcher Radio , Google Play, and Apple podcasts!

Thank you SO much for stopping by. God bless, keep and make His face to shine upon you as you #StayOnTheWall!

Love,

BCU

15 Jan 20184 Dec 2018

BlenCouragesU1 Comment

2017 lesson: Dealing with betrayal (part 2)

Hey 👋🏾 there BCU Family!

Podcast highlights:

Offenses will come..and ANYONE we come in contact with is subject to offending us.
Hurt and anger are natural, normal emotions to being offended, yet we are responsible for how we react toward the persons. (Matthew 18 is an awesome Scripture reference and shows the blueprint of how do deal with an offense).
Forgiveness is REQUIRED.
Accept the apology you may never receive.

Scripture references

Woe unto the world because of offenses! for it must needs be that offenses come; but woe to that man by whom the offence cometh! (Matthew 18:7).

Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven (Matthew 18:21-22).

“For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses (Matthew 6:14-15).

Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,” says the Lord (Romans 12:19).

For in many things we offend all. If any man offend not in word, the same is a perfect man, and able also to bridle the whole body (James 3:2).

The discretion of a man defers his anger; and it is his glory to pass over a transgression (Proverbs 19:11).

Love suffers long…(I Corinthians 13:4).

So, BCU Fam, as HURTFUL as this situation was, I thank God for Jesus taking away the pain, so much so, that I can (through Him only), continue to see and work with the offenders as if nothing ever happened. That’s how you KNOW God is working in your life! Glory to God!

And He can and will do the same for you–as we humble ourselves to Jesus in prayer and ask Him to forgive us for holding on to the grudge and to forgive the offender. We also can ask for the grace to ask someone for forgiveness as well. I am a witness, once you do, you’ll feel so much better in you spirit, mind and body–AND you’ll know you are more Christ-like in the process. That’s the goal we’re striving for, amen?! Amen!

Have you ever been betrayed or hurt by a co-worker, spouse, friend or family member? How did you handle it? There’s a comment section here on the BCU site, just ripe for us to continue our conversation!

In the meantime, if you have not subscribed to BlenCouragesU.com, please do so! It’s free and a good place to get the encouragement, inspiration and information based the Word of God! Additionally, you can also see what we are up to on Facebook, Twitter , Instagram, and YouTube! You can also listen in and subscribe to the podcast on Stitcher Radio , Google Play, and Apple podcasts!

Thank you SO much for stopping by. God bless, keep and make His face to shine upon you as you #StayOnTheWall!

Love,

BCU

8 Jan 20187 Jan 2018

BlenCouragesU1 Comment

When gossip strikes back…

Hey 👋🏾 there BCU Family!

As usual, you have the option of listening to our podcast (click the BCU avatar below to listen), reading the notes or BOTH. In any case, we pray the post blesses you. If so, please thumbs up or leave a comment! Thank you and enjoy the post!

There’s a gospel song called “Birds in the Church”. Actually, its a narrative by Rev. Benjamin Cone, Jr. (from Mississippi Mass Choir, I believe) who among other things, tells us how people can be a lot like parrots–freely repeating other people’s business. I get tickled when I hear it, but the truth is evident!!!

Before I was saved, I could be a little “Willona-ish” (remember her from the TV show Good Times?) when it came to discussing the happenings of people’s lives. The intent wasn’t malicious, just something to talk about, dissect, and share my “expert opinion” on the matter at hand.

macaw-2671151_640 — “Chile, have you heard?”

This behavior continued after I got saved….more of a bad habit, I suppose–and apparently, God was trying to get my attention.And He did when I shared something rather personal/serious in confidence with someone I’ll call “Thelma”, who went back told their family. Mayhap that wouldn’t have been so bad, if the family was offering sound wisdom, but Thelma came back to tell me the family laughed about it. That may sound petty to you all, but I was SO hurt that someone would repeat and make light of my concerns to others so casually.

Another time, I was involved in a sensitive situation where someone I’ll call “JJ” had to get involved. Now, JJ was helpful throughout the situation, but promptly started spreading the details of what happened and it got back to me.

I politely confronted JJ, letting them know it really wasn’t right getting others involved in a matter that was supposed to stay between selected persons. JJ was VERY apologetic–and I’m certain the chatter wasn’t done to be mean, rather it was just JJ’s habitual, but hurtful behavior. With God’s grace, I forgave Thelma and JJ and we’re cool, but I have to say I felt really hurt, embarrassed and betrayed! Through that pain, God showed me how awful it is to idly parrot and betray confidences AND that my idle chatter were NOT Christ-like at ALL! Thankfully, with His help that behavior soon ceased in Jesus name, and has been dormant for the past couple of decades.

In the days since those times, God guides me on who to tell what to and when to do it. Luke 2:16-19 tells us about the birth of Jesus and how the angels talked to the shepherds and those shepherds told people, but Mary, the mother of Jesus, now “kept all these things and pondered things in her heart”. There is a valid reason she didn’t share that information with everybody! Follow the leading of the Lord as to who to confide with.

Another lesson is, that God also blessed me to be a confidant. People do come to me with sensitive information and private challenges, knowing that with the grace of God, I will offer wise council, pray and keep the matter between us. No ifs, ands, buts or suppose. Period.

My final lesson is that people have also come to me with other’s business and that behavior needs to be shut that down with a swift retort like, “I will keep the situation/persons in prayer”, “that’s not my battle to fight–only God can work that out”, or “have you been praying for them?” Talking about someone is not as effective as praying for them. I’m not saying that we can’t talk through someone’s situation to understand things better or help that individual in crisis—we just need to be sensitive to how the Holy Ghost is telling us to handle it so we’re truly walking in the Spirit, rather than the flesh.

The bottom line? The Bible says we will give an account for every idle word spoken (Matthew 12:36). That means we have to explain or justify WHY we said what we said., and I have to tell you, BCU Fam, we will have NO justification whatsoever. Let’s repent TODAY and with the help of God, work on our spiritual balance sheet, so that we will have more credits (allowing the Holy Spirit to guide our conversation) rather than debits (allowing the flesh to rule the conversation). Amen? Amen!

So, BCU Fam, what’s your reaction to this week’s post? How do you guard against gossip coming out of your mouth and staying out of your ears? Please scroll on down to the comments section and let’s continue our conversation!

In the meantime, if you have not subscribed to BlenCouragesU.com, please do so! It’s free and a good place to get the encouragement, inspiration and information based the Word of God! Additionally, you can also see what we are up to on Facebook, Twitter , Instagram, and YouTube! You can also listen in and subscribe to the podcast on Stitcher Radio , Google Play, and iTunes!

Thank you SO much for stopping by. God bless, keep and make His face to shine upon you as you #StayOnTheWall!

Love,

BCU