Biblical Confrontation: Navigating Offenses According to God’s Word

Here there BCU Family!

I typically record our content in an informal “podcast on the go” format. Many times, the Lord gives me subject matter as I am driving or waiting, so I record on the spot! You can access the podcast here, or click on the avatar below, as you refer to the show notes below for the highlights. We pray the podcast blesses and encourages you. If so, please thumbs up AND leave a comment! Thank you and enjoy the podcast!

Podcast highlights:

  • Effective communication and confrontation is an essential part of our walk with Christ.
  • Confrontation is biblical—but it has to be done according to God’s directions.
  • The Lord presented me with a situation where I had to have a difficult conversation with a person of authority.
  • God has a way of things working out—if we do things His way, even when our flesh thinks it knows better.

KJV Scripture References

Proverbs 15:1

A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.

Matthew 18:7;15-17

7 Woe unto the world because of offences! for it must needs be that offences come; but woe to that man by whom the offence cometh!

15 Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother.

16 But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.

17 And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican.

James 3:2

 For in many things we offend all. If any man offend not in word, the same is a perfect man, and able also to bridle the whole body.

Matthew 5:23-24

23 Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee;

24 Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift.


BCUFam, it’s important for us to follow God’s directions when it comes to offenses. What I am seeing among some of the people of God is speculation, accusations, and cancellations—-before a conversation is had with the accused. Unaddressed offenses often turn into bitterness, anger, wrath, clamor and evil speaking against the offender. While we do not minimize the hurt the person caused (which is why we go to them in the first place), the Word also says to be kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you (See Ephesians 4:31-32). When God puts it that way, it’s time to let these offenses GO! Amen? Amen! Let’s pray!

Father, in the name of Jesus, as always, we thank You for what You have spoken to our hearts. Jesus, please help us to prayerfully examine our hearts for any bitterness, lack of forgiveness, anger or distance in between us and the people in our lives. We pray that hurt feelings, broken hearts and tattered relationships will be healed, and that you will help us to forgive others like You have forgiven us.

Help us to approach anyone we need to according to the directions You have outlined, without fear or worry about the outcome. If our brother/sister chooses to receive us and be reconciled, we thank You, Jesus and if they do not, we STILL say thank You, Jesus knowing we followed Your will and way, and we can stand before You in peace.

Going forward, Jesus, we ask that You help us to manage all the relationships and interactions we have with people so that You are honored and glorified! It is in the name of Jesus Christ, we pray, and thank You, Amen!


As a reminder, if you have not subscribed to BlenCouragesU.com, please do so! It’s free and a good place to get the encouragement, inspiration and information based the Word of God! Additionally, you can also see what we are up to on Facebook, X, and Instagram. Also, if you so inclined, join us Thursday nights––we are LIVE on YouTube 8:05EST/7:05CST. You can also listen in and subscribe to the podcast on Apple podcasts, Pandora, and Spotify!

Thank you SO much for stopping by! God bless, keep and make His face to shine upon you as you #StayOnTheWall!

Love,

BCU

Cut-off Culture | Michele L. Perry

Hey there BCU Fam!

Because of the informal format, please tune into the podcast recording (click here or on the BCU avatar below) and refer to the written post for the highlights. We pray the post blesses and encourages you. If so, please thumbs up AND leave a comment! Thank you and enjoy the post!

Podcast highlights:

  • “Cut-off culture” is a relatively new phrase, but not a new phenomenon.
  • Basically, when someone offends you, cut-off culture says stop dealing with the person immediately and permanently.
  • This mindset is contrary to the Word of God and should be avoided as a way to handle all offenses.
  • A friend of mine, Michele L. Perry, spoke about this attitude in a post about a conversation she had with her late father.

Scripture references:

Matthew 5:43-48

43 Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy.

44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;

45 That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.

46 For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? do not even the publicans the same?

47 And if ye salute your brethren only, what do ye more than others? do not even the publicans so?

48 Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.

Proverbs 3:5-6

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.

In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

Ephesians 4:31-32

31 Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:

32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.


BCUFam, we thank the Lord for Michele and sharing her story so that we can stay away from participating in this cut-off culture that is so prevalent right now. The Lord knew that we would be offended by people, so He gave us the blueprint as to how to handle it—we go to the person and talk to them about it (see Matthew 18:15). By doing things God’s way, we will get perfect [however God works it out] results. Amen? Amen! Let’s pray!

Father, in the name of Jesus, as we come before You today, we thank You for coming by with a Word to encourage us to examine ourselves. We thank You for helping us to see any lack of forgiveness, or patterns of cancelling people, in any relationships that we have, and helping us to choose to walk out Ephesians 4:32, where we are commanded to be kind, forgiving and tender-hearted toward one another.

Bless us to remember that You have forgiven us, so we want to continue forgive others. Thank You for the victory in this area, so we are without spot, wrinkle or blemish, and You are glorified in our lives, in Jesus name, we pray, Amen.


As a reminder, if you have not subscribed to BlenCouragesU.com, please do so! It’s free and a good place to get the encouragement, inspiration and information based the Word of God! Additionally, you can also see what we are up to on Facebook, X, and Instagram.

Also, if you so inclined, join us for our Thursday Night Bible Study––we are LIVE on YouTube 8:05EST/7:05CST. You can also listen in and subscribe to the podcast on whatever platform BCU is available on. Some of those platforms are Amazon Music, AnchorFm, Apple PodcastsGoogle PodcastsiHeart Radio, Spotify,  Stitcher Radio , and many more of your favorite podcast platforms!

Thank you SO much for stopping by! May God bless, keep and make His face to shine upon you as you #StayOnTheWall!

Love,

BCU

Receiving forgiveness

Hey there BCU Fam!

Typically, you have the option of listening to our podcast, reading the notes or both. For this post, because of the informal format, please tune into the podcast recording (click here or on the BCU avatar below) and refer to the written post for the highlights. We pray the post blesses and encourages you. If so, please thumbs up AND leave a comment! Thank you and enjoy the post!

Podcast highlights:

  • In our last podcast, we talked about a cherished friend who biblically and gently confronted me on an important matter.
  • In that same conversation, we talked about how important it is to receive forgiveness without the constant mind replay or any self-punishment. Otherwise, we are operating in a spirit of pride.

Scripture references

Matthew 18:7;35

Woe unto the world because of offences! for it must needs be that offences come; but woe to that man by whom the offence cometh!

35 So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.

James 3:2

2 For in many things we offend all. If any man offend not in word, the same is a perfect man, and able also to bridle the whole body.

Galatians 5:1

1 Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage.

John 8:1-11

1 Jesus went unto the mount of Olives.

2 And early in the morning he came again into the temple, and all the people came unto him; and he sat down, and taught them.

3 And the scribes and Pharisees brought unto him a woman taken in adultery; and when they had set her in the midst,

4 They say unto him, Master, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act.

5 Now Moses in the law commanded us, that such should be stoned: but what sayest thou?

6 This they said, tempting him, that they might have to accuse him. But Jesus stooped down, and with his finger wrote on the ground, as though he heard them not.

7 So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.

8 And again he stooped down, and wrote on the ground.

9 And they which heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even unto the last: and Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst.

10 When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee?

11 She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.

Philippians 4:8

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.



When we try do something over and above what God is doing, we are operating in a spirit of pride.

While God will convict us to lead us to repentance, God is not interested in making is feel guilty for the remainder of our lives–that’s a trick of the enemy and after today, we will no longer fall prey to that deception! Once we realize our error, the object is to repent/ask for God and the person, (if needed) for forgiveness, receive it, and then note the lesson God taught us through our mistake, and apply that lesson going forward. We can walk in the freedom that God has intended us to, knowing that we are loved by Him without ANY replays, guilt or shame. Amen? Amen!

As a reminder, if you have not subscribed to BlenCouragesU.com, please do so! It’s free and a good place to get the encouragement, inspiration and information based the Word of God! Additionally, you can also see what we are up to on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. Also, if you so inclined, join us Thursday nights––we are LIVE on YouTube 8:05EST/7:05CST. You can also listen in and subscribe to the podcast on Stitcher Radio Google Play, and Apple Podcasts.

Thank you SO much for stopping by. God bless, keep and make His face to shine upon you as you #StayOnTheWall!

Love,

BCU

Fill-in-the-blank..or not.

Hey there BCU Fam!

Typically, you have the option of listening to our podcast, reading the notes or both. For this post, because of the informal format, please tune into the podcast recording (click here or on the BCU avatar below) and refer to the written post for the highlights. We pray the post blesses and encourages you. If so, please thumbs up AND leave a comment! Thank you and enjoy the post!

Podcast highlights:

  • A common theme the Lord has put on my mind and in my teaching is forgiveness, biblical confrontation and reconciliation.
  • At some point in all relationships, we will either be offended or offend someone–the key is handling it God’s way.
  • Someone dear to me very gently confronted me about an important date I missed.
  • Let’s talk about how the Lord used the situation to be a blessing to the both of us.

Scripture references

Matthew 18:7,15.

Woe unto the world because of offences! for it must needs be that offences come; but woe to that man by whom the offence cometh!

15 Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother.

James 3:2

2 For in many things we offend all. If any man offend not in word, the same is a perfect man, and able also to bridle the whole body.

Proverbs 3:6

In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

Ephesians 4:31-32

31 Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:

32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.


Matthew 18:21-35

21 Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times?

22 Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.

23 Therefore is the kingdom of heaven likened unto a certain king, which would take account of his servants.

24 And when he had begun to reckon, one was brought unto him, which owed him ten thousand talents.

25 But forasmuch as he had not to pay, his lord commanded him to be sold, and his wife, and children, and all that he had, and payment to be made.

26 The servant therefore fell down, and worshipped him, saying, Lord, have patience with me, and I will pay thee all.

27 Then the lord of that servant was moved with compassion, and loosed him, and forgave him the debt.

28 But the same servant went out, and found one of his fellowservants, which owed him an hundred pence: and he laid hands on him, and took him by the throat, saying, Pay me that thou owest.

29 And his fellowservant fell down at his feet, and besought him, saying, Have patience with me, and I will pay thee all.

30 And he would not: but went and cast him into prison, till he should pay the debt.

31 So when his fellowservants saw what was done, they were very sorry, and came and told unto their lord all that was done.

32 Then his lord, after that he had called him, said unto him, O thou wicked servant, I forgave thee all that debt, because thou desiredst me:

33 Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellowservant, even as I had pity on thee?

34 And his lord was wroth, and delivered him to the tormentors, till he should pay all that was due unto him.

35 So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.


When our expectations are not met, we tend to “fill in the blanks” with the wrong answers. @blencouragesu


BCU Fam, when we allow the fill-in-the-blank spirit to reign, we continue walking in offense where the anger, animosity, bitterness and wrath replays in our hearts and minds. Eventually our evil-thinking of the person leads to evil-speaking about the individual to others–and in actuality, whether in our hearts or to someone else, incorrect blank-filling or evil-speaking is a direct violation of the Word of God (See Ephesians 4:31-32).

“We should strive for forgiveness being automatic in our hearts” –SuperFriend

With the help of the Lord, my Super Friend was a perfect example of following the Word of God by praying about the situation, reaching out quickly, gently confronting me, all while thinking AND speaking in love (You forgot–I know this isn’t like you), followed by immediate forgiveness! As we were ending our conversation, Super Friend said, “building true relationships eliminates the fill-in-the-blank spirit”, and that is spot on, BCU Fam. When we do things God’s way, there are no blanks to fill in–He tells us exactly what to do and once we do, He will instruct us as to how to handle the situation so the results will be perfect, because God is perfect. Amen? Amen!

As a reminder, if you have not subscribed to BlenCouragesU.com, please do so! It’s free and a good place to get the encouragement, inspiration and information based the Word of God! Additionally, you can also see what we are up to on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. Also, if you so inclined, join us Thursday nights––we are LIVE on YouTube 8:05EST/7:05CST. You can also listen in and subscribe to the podcast on Stitcher Radio Google Play, and Apple Podcasts.

Thank you SO much for stopping by. God bless, keep and make His face to shine upon you as you #StayOnTheWall!

Love,

BCU

I HAD the receipt…

Hey there BCU Fam!

Typically, you have the option of listening to our podcast, reading the notes or both. For this post, because of the informal format, please tune into the podcast recording (click here or on the BCU avatar below) and refer to the written post for the highlights. We pray the post blesses and encourages you. If so, please thumbs up AND leave a comment! Thank you and enjoy the post!

Podcast highlights:

  • My parents taught us valuable biblically and practical life lessons.
  • One lesson taught me to always get a receipt and a bag as proof of purchase.
  • It was also imperative to keep the receipt in case the item needed to be returned.
  • Keeping receipts is good for things, but not on people.

Scripture references

Matthew 18:1-10

At the same time came the disciples unto Jesus, saying, Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?

And Jesus called a little child unto him, and set him in the midst of them,

And said, Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.

Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is greatest in the kingdom of heaven.

And whoso shall receive one such little child in my name receiveth me.

But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea.

Woe unto the world because of offences! for it must needs be that offences come; but woe to that man by whom the offence cometh!

Wherefore if thy hand or thy foot offend thee, cut them off, and cast them from thee: it is better for thee to enter into life halt or maimed, rather than having two hands or two feet to be cast into everlasting fire.

And if thine eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: it is better for thee to enter into life with one eye, rather than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire.

10 Take heed that ye despise not one of these little ones; for I say unto you, That in heaven their angels do always behold the face of my Father which is in heaven.

Matthew 18:21-35

21 Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times?

22 Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.

23 Therefore is the kingdom of heaven likened unto a certain king, which would take account of his servants.

24 And when he had begun to reckon, one was brought unto him, which owed him ten thousand talents.

25 But forasmuch as he had not to pay, his lord commanded him to be sold, and his wife, and children, and all that he had, and payment to be made.

26 The servant therefore fell down, and worshipped him, saying, Lord, have patience with me, and I will pay thee all.

27 Then the lord of that servant was moved with compassion, and loosed him, and forgave him the debt.

28 But the same servant went out, and found one of his fellowservants, which owed him an hundred pence: and he laid hands on him, and took him by the throat, saying, Pay me that thou owest.

29 And his fellowservant fell down at his feet, and besought him, saying, Have patience with me, and I will pay thee all.

30 And he would not: but went and cast him into prison, till he should pay the debt.

31 So when his fellowservants saw what was done, they were very sorry, and came and told unto their lord all that was done.

32 Then his lord, after that he had called him, said unto him, O thou wicked servant, I forgave thee all that debt, because thou desiredst me:

33 Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellowservant, even as I had pity on thee?

34 And his lord was wroth, and delivered him to the tormentors, till he should pay all that was due unto him.

35 So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.

Getting offended is inevitable. Staying offended is a choice.


BCUFam, I’d be less than truthful if I said forgiving from the heart is an easy task. When we look at how the Lord says to handle offenses and what happens when we do not, (see verses 34-35), no offense is worth losing our soul over. God is really good about helping us forgive completely–and we’ll know we did because the offense is like that faded receipt. Sure, we remember the encounter, but we can talk about the situation (as we are led), from a healed and whole heart, only remembering whatever lesson God wanted to teach us. Maybe we’ll talk about that more the next time we are together.

As a reminder, if you have not subscribed to BlenCouragesU.com, please do so! It’s free and a good place to get the encouragement, inspiration and information based the Word of God! Additionally, you can also see what we are up to on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. Also, if you so inclined, join us Thursday nights––we are LIVE on YouTube 8:05EST/7:05CST. You can also listen in and subscribe to the podcast on Stitcher Radio Google Play, and Apple Podcasts.

Thank you SO much for stopping by. God bless, keep and make His face to shine upon you as you #StayOnTheWall!

Love,

BCU