Declaring independence from “foolishmess”

Hey family!

It’s been another minute, I’ve been a little busy running, but it’s all good. It’s wonderful to be busy!! Ladies, I wanted to share a recent experience or maybe test that echoes the importance of prayer, and exercising wisdom so your are free from “foolishmess”.

I was at a conference at a hotel where a handsome guy from across the aisle and I made eye contact and smiled. Very nice. After the conference let out, as I went to run an errand, we ran into each other. He very politely asked what I was doing later, where I was going to eat and could he “holla at me” (hmm) after my errand. As I was going, the Lord gave me the foresight to pray before I talked to this guy. I told the Lord is this was going to be frippery, he needed to just go away.

As I made my way back from my errand, I heard “yo, yo, YO!” I turned around and it was Dude. Now remember, I’m quite grown; I haven’t seriously been called “yo” probably since I was in high school and didn’t like it then. After this, Dude asked me to call him. Not on his cell, but the room he was staying in!!! On top of that it was in hushed tones! Yall can draw your own conclusions on what Dude was thinking. What kind of monkeyshine is that? Men are still “ackin’” like this who are over age 35? Seriously?!

While I was disgusted by Dud, I mean Dude trying to run a game on me, I thank God for helping me to think and recognize the trick of the enemy. He likes to send a decoy you when you’ve been waiting and trusting God for your blessing. Let’s review the highlight–well lowlight reel in this guy’s game. Any man who really wants to approach a lady will NOT address her by “yo”. And a real lady won’t answer to that, either. That 106 and Park talk is not àpropos for a virtuous woman whose price is far above rubies (Proverbs 31:10).

2) When a man wants to get to know you, he will ask you for YOUR number and pursue you, rather than him telling you to pursue him. That’s against the natural order of things! By nature men are hunters and like a challenge. They don’t value anything handed to them! Genesis 29:20 says Jacob worked seven years for Rachel, but it seemed like a few days because of the love he had for her. That’s what I’m talking about!!!!

3) I know this is obvious, but is worth a revisit. No man should act like he’s worried about seeing you in public. I have heard, “oh he’s shy” and “sometimes you have to help them along”. I don’t discount shyness or advocate women giving men a hard time “just cuz”. There is NO excuse for Dude to be looking over his shoulder and whispering while talking to you. That’s code for married, engaged, attached, or scouting out his next prey.

Single ladies, I so know the exasperation of waiting to get a Boaz only to get a Bozo! Pray about your encounters with guys, so you’ll react with wisdom rather than emotion. James 1:5 says God gives wisdom liberally for the asking. Why make foolish, emotional decisions unnecessarily? Better to not get into a situation than get caught out and live with the consequences.

With God’s help, do NOT be the low-lying fruit that a man can come by and pluck off the vine. The sweetest fruit is at the top of the tree and requires some work by the person who wants it—it’s okay to let him work for it. Know your worth and trust that good and perfect gifts come from God (James 1:17). If the gift doesn’t fall in that category, it’s NOT from God—-reject it, keep waiting and renewing your strength like Isaiah 40:31 reminds us! Your blessing is enroute!

God bless you!


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Just an average girl. Saved by and serving an AWESOME God who assigned me to help encourage His people to #StayOnTheWall.

14 thoughts on “Declaring independence from “foolishmess”

  1. AMEN AMEN AND AMEN!!! We as women and especially God’s children are far worth MORE than this mess some guys come at us with. Lord help them and help the women who fall prey to it because they don’t understand their worth… “WAIT ON THE LORD” , It’s not easy, but it’s better than a life of misery with someone who will not treat you like the QUEEN you are.
    I really enojoyed this sis. I love reading your blog 🙂


    1. Hi Sis!

      Amen back at you, Sis–wonderful comments!!!!!!!!!!! It’s the grace of God and His life lessons, I think I finally GOT IT! LOL!! I want to let others know “foolishmess” may stop by, but you don’t have to let it in! In the meantime waiting will give you strength–the Bible doesn’t lie!

      You made my day stopping by to comment–so glad this blessed you!!! Thanks so much!!!!

      Love you!



  2. Comments from Facebook:

    Garry A. ~Way to go sis! Loved it! Y’all check this out!
    Sonja M.~ wanted to tell you how very much your blog post blessed me. Its so funny, yet profoundly wise and encouraging. Thank you!
    Sherry G.~that was wonderful Blenda!
    Marron H.~Amen, Ms. B. Love this and just have to share it with some sisters and brothers that aren’t “websters.”…………..


    1. Welcome Rikesha!

      Glory to God!!! I’m delighted to NO end that the Lord blessed you through this medium! May He continue to bless and strengthen you ALWAYS!!! MUAH!!!


  3. Thanks for a marvelous posting! I definitely enjoyed reading it, you can be a great author.
    I will be sure to bookmark your blog and may come back sometime soon. I
    want to encourage you to definitely continue your great writing,
    have a nice afternoon!


  4. Admiring the hard work you put into your blog and in depth information you present.
    It’s nice to come across a blog every once in a while that isn’t
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    I’ve bookmarked your site and I’m including your RSS feeds to my Google account.


  5. Blen,

    You know every word of this post resonates with the Single Woman’s Cheerleader. Thanks for stopping by my blog and leaving a comment. It’s how I found you here and was able to LOL while reading this post. You deserve so much more than a DUD and I’m glad you know it.

    God bless you!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Yvonne!!

      You are SO welcome—I am GLAD I found YOU as well, Sis! Your blog is AMAZING!

      I have LOTS of dud stories I could tell, (LOLOLOLOL), but the Lord is faithful to remind me to minister to/pray for them and keep moving!

      Thanks much for stopping by, Yvonne—feel free to come back anytime!




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