Stopping the replay part 3: The reaction

Hey 👋🏾 there BCU Family!

Typically, you have the option of listening to our podcast, reading the notes or both. For this post, because of the conversational format, please tune into the podcast recording and refer to the written post for the highlights and corresponding Scriptures. We pray the post blesses and encourages you.  If so, please thumbs up AND leave a comment! Thank you and enjoy the post!

In part one of our series,  we talked about how we handled difficult conversations that are left with hurt feelings and unresolved issues, to whit, we often tend to replay the conversation in our heads over and over again. The root of the replay is lack of forgiveness which is importance and a necessity in a christian’s life (See Matthew 18). Last time, we took a look at the need for us to forgive ourselves.  In our final installment, let’s explore the replay in terms of “the reaction”. You know, how the you or the other person re/act before, during or after a conversation.

Podcast highlights:

  • We sometimes rehearse the outcome in our minds because of:

— the actual reaction (usually unfavorable).

–the anticipated reaction (what might happen).

–the inaction (the person didn’t react/follow-through how YOU wanted).

  • These feelings are rooted in pride, fear and/or a lack of trust in God’s Word and direction.
  • Unless there is a victory report, replays are not of God.

 

 

Scripture to consider:

For God has not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind (2 Timothy 1:7) .

Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ.. (2 Corinthians 10:5).

For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world (1 John 2:16).

Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother (Matthew 18:15).

Be not afraid of their faces: for I am with thee to deliver thee, says the LORD (Jeremiah 1:8).

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things (Philippians 4:8).

Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer (Psalm 19:14).

What are your thoughts on what we’ve talked about? How are your “self-conversations” going to be different? Let’s talk about it in the comments section!

In the meantime, if you have not subscribed to BlenCouragesU.com, please do so! It’s free and a good place to get the encouragement, inspiration and information based the Word of God! Additionally, you can also see what we are up to on Facebook, Twitter , Instagram, and  YouTube! You can also listen in and subscribe to the podcast on Stitcher Radio , Google Play, and Apple podcasts!

Thank you SO much for stopping by. God bless, keep and make His face to shine upon you as you #StayOnTheWall!

Love,

BCU

When gossip strikes back…

Hey 👋🏾 there BCU Family!

As usual, you have the option of listening to our podcast (click the BCU avatar below to listen), reading the notes or BOTH. In any case, we pray the post blesses you. If so, please thumbs up or leave a comment! Thank you and enjoy the post!

There’s a gospel song called “Birds in the Church”. Actually, its a narrative by Rev. Benjamin Cone, Jr. (from Mississippi Mass Choir, I believe) who among other things, tells us how people can be a lot like parrots–freely repeating other people’s business. I get tickled when I hear it, but the truth is evident!!!

Before I was saved, I could be a little “Willona-ish” (remember her from the TV show Good Times) when it came to discussing the happenings of people’s lives. The intent wasn’t malicious, just something to talk about, dissect, and share my “expert opinion” on the matter at hand.

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“Chile, have you heard?”

This behavior continued after I got saved….more of a bad habit, I suppose–and apparently God was trying to get my attention and did when I shared something rather personal/serious in confidence with someone I’ll call “Thelma”, who went back told their family.  Mayhap that wouldn’t have been so bad, if the family was offering sound wisdom, but Thelma came back to tell me the family laughed about it. That may sound petty to you all, but I was SO hurt that someone would repeat and make light of my concerns to others so casually.

 

Another time, I was involved in a sensitive situation where someone I’ll call “JJ” had to get involved. Now, JJ was helpful throughout the situation, but promptly started spreading the details of what happened and it got back to me.

I politely confronted JJ, letting them know it really wasn’t right getting others involved in a matter that was supposed to stay between selected persons. JJ was VERY apologetic–and I’m certain the chatter wasn’t done to be mean, rather it was just JJ’s habitual, but hurtful behavior.  With God’s grace, I forgave Thelma and JJ and we’re cool, but I have to say I felt really hurt, embarrassed and betrayed! Through that pain, God showed me how awful it is to idly parrot and betray confidences AND that my idle chatter were NOT Christ-like at ALL! Thankfully, with His help that behavior soon ceased in Jesus name, and has been dormant for the past couple of decades.

In the days since those times, God guides me on who to tell what to and when to do it. Luke 2:16-19 tells us about the birth of Jesus and how the angels talked to the shepherds and those shepherds told people, but Mary, the mother of Jesus, now “kept all these things and pondered things in her heart”. There is a valid reason she didn’t share that information with everybody!  Follow the leading of the Lord as to who to confide with.

Another lesson is, that God also blessed me to be a confidant. People do come to me with sensitive information and private challenges, knowing that with the grace of God, I will offer wise council, pray and keep the matter between us. No ifs, ands, buts or suppose. Period.

My final lesson is that people have also come to me with other’s business and that behavior needs to be shut that down with a swift retort like, “I will keep the situation/persons in prayer”, “that’s not my battle to fight–only God can work that out”, or “have you been praying for them?” Talking about someone is not as effective as praying for them. I’m not saying that we can’t talk through someone’s situation to understand things better or help that individual in crisis—we just need to be sensitive to how the Holy Ghost is telling us to handle it so we’re truly walking in the Spirit, rather than the flesh.

The bottom line?  The Bible says we will give an account for every idle word spoken (Matthew 12:36).  That means we have to explain or justify WHY we said what we said., and I have to tell you, BCU Fam, we will have NO justification whatsoever.  Let’s repent TODAY and with the help of God, work on our spiritual balance sheet, so that we will have more credits (allowing the Holy Spirit to guide our conversation) rather than debits (allowing the flesh to rule the conversation). Amen? Amen!

So, BCU Fam, what’s your reaction to this week’s post? How do you guard against gossip coming out of your mouth and staying out of your ears?  Please scroll on down to the comments section and let’s continue our conversation!

In the meantime, if you have not subscribed to BlenCouragesU.com, please do so! It’s free and a good place to get the encouragement, inspiration and information based the Word of God! Additionally, you can also see what we are up to on Facebook, Twitter , Instagram, and  YouTube! You can also listen in and subscribe to the podcast on Stitcher Radio , Google Play, and iTunes!

Thank you SO much for stopping by. God bless, keep and make His face to shine upon you as you #StayOnTheWall!

Love,

BCU

 

 

Thank you

Hi everyone,

I just want to thank you all SO much for the support, comments and feedback on your blog. Yes, it’s YOUR blog, I’m just the facilitator! :0D I am looking forward to more topic discussion, encouragement and blessings for all of you as we walk in this season triumphantly! May God bless you all in Jesus’ name!

Love,

~Blen