Fear and People-pleasing

Hey there BCU Fam!

For this post, because of the informal format, please tune into the podcast recording (click here or on the BCU avatar below) and refer to the written post for the highlights. We pray the post blesses and encourages you. If so, please thumbs up AND leave a comment! Thank you and enjoy the post!

Podcast highlights:

  • In my recent internet travels, an influencer spoke about fear as is relates to people-pleasing.
  • While trauma is usually the reason, basically speaking, people-pleasing is rooted in the spirit of fear.
  • Sometimes, we operate in the fear of what will happen if we say “no” to people, especially if they are powerful, have influence, have something we need, or have a habit of “making” us feel guilty. That is called a snare.
  • If God tells us to say no, we must trust that He has better way, and His way will keep us safe.

Scripture references

Proverbs 29:25

25 The fear of man bringeth a snare: but whoso putteth his trust in the Lord shall be safe.

I Timothy 1:7

7 For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

Galatians 5:19-21

19 Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness,

20 Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies,

21 Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.

Proverbs 21:1

The king’s heart is in the hand of the Lord, as the rivers of water: he turneth it whithersoever he will.

Galatians 1:10

10 For do I now persuade men, or God? or do I seek to please men? for if I yet pleased men, I should not be the servant of Christ.

Ephesians 6:10

Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of His might.

People-pleasing is rooted in the spirit of fear. What is it about this person that we are so afraid of?

BCUFam, people-pleasing and the addiction to people-approval is a subtle snare set up by the enemy, and many of us have gotten caught up in it. The good news is that Jesus has come to set us free from the fear of people! If we can trust that He will take care of us despite what the people say, then we will ALWAYS be safe. Let’s pray!

Father in the name of Jesus, we thank you for your Word that reminds us that we do NOT have to live in the fear of people. As we come before you, please forgive us for the times that we allowed fear to put others before You, Lord. Also, Lord, please forgive us for being the person who used fear to set a snare for someone else.

In the name of Jesus, we ask you to please come in set us all free from the snare of people-pleasing! Break every chain of people-approval, over-explaining ,and even being the person who is using our power or influence to make someone fearful of us. Free us, Jesus from the guilt that comes after we say “no”. And Lord, if we are being told “no”, help us to receive it graciously! Bless us to remember not to be a snare to anyone, because You supply our needs, Jesus. We trust that You will work everything out for us, Your way and in Your time. So while we wait, we thank You, Jesus for sustaining us.

Fill our hearts and minds with your perfect love, as I John 4:18 reminds us, that casts out all fear, and please bless us to continue walking in our deliverance and victory! Thank You Jesus for blessing us to trust in You, so that we are safe. We thank You for answering our plea, and will ever give Your Name the praise, glory and honor for Who You are and all You do for us. It is in Jesus name we pray and thank You, Lord! Amen!

As a reminder, if you have not subscribed to BlenCouragesU.com, please do so! It’s free and a good place to get the encouragement, inspiration and information based the Word of God! Additionally, you can also see what we are up to on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

Also, if you so inclined, join us for our Thursday Night Bible Study––we are LIVE on YouTube 8:05EST/7:05CST. You can also listen in and subscribe to the podcast on whatever platform BCU is available on. Some of those platforms are Amazon Music, AnchorFm, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, iHeart Radio, Spotify,  Stitcher Radio , and many more!

Thank you SO much for stopping by! May God bless, keep and make His face to shine upon you as you #StayOnTheWall!

Love,

BCU

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Singles Chalkboard: Silly women FINALE

Hey there BCU Family!

Typically, you have the option of listening to our podcast, reading the notes or both. For this post, because of the interview format, please tune into the podcast recording and refer to the written post for the highlights. We pray the post blesses and encourages you. If so, please thumbs up AND leave a comment! Thank you and enjoy the post!

Podcast highlights:

  • God has blessed all mankind, but especially women with attributes like knowledge, tenacity and virtue (See Proverbs 31:9-31).
  • Very often, women can be beguiled into saying and doing things that do not line up with the Word of God (See Genesis 3).
  • Because we serve a wise God, He wants women to walk in the wisdom, knowledge, instruction and understanding that He gives us.
  • So, we must understand not only what a silly woman is, but what to look out for, so we do not fall for the “okie-doke”.
  • We also want to be sure we are not walking in the ungodly attributes Paul lists in 2 Timothy 3.
  • Previously, we the why of the post along with verses 1 & 2. Then we took an in-depth look at verse 3 and then onto verse 4.  Last time, we talked through verses 5, 6, & 7. Let’s overview all verses including 8 and 9!

Scripture references

2 Timothy Chapter 3 (KJV)

1 This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come.

2 For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,

3 Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good,

4 Traitors, heady, high-minded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;

5 Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.

6 For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts,

7 Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.

8 Now as Jannes and Jambres withstood Moses, so do these also resist the truth: men of corrupt minds, reprobate concerning the faith.

9 But they shall proceed no further: for their folly shall be manifest unto all men, as their’s also was.

So BCU Family once again, I have to confess that this subject is not one that is comfortable. No one wants to be or admit that they are silly–it can feel like an putting down of women, if not viewed in the right way.  Truth be told, when we look at the news, around the lives of our friends and family and even ourselves, many women have been or are are still being held captive.

We’re here to expose the enemy so we can avoid and escape captivity in the freeing and POWERFUL name of Jesus! If you or someone you know need prayer or encouragement on this topic, please send and email to Blen@BlenCouragesU.com (subject line: Silly Women) or send a private message to any of the BCU social media accounts (listed below). If these posts have resonated with you or you have thoughts to share, please head down to the comments section to share your thoughts so we can continue our conversation!

Finally,  if you have not subscribed to BlenCouragesU.com, please do so! It’s free and a good place to get the encouragement, inspiration and information based the Word of God! Additionally, you can also see what we are up to on Facebook, Twitter,  and Instagram! You can also listen in and subscribe to the podcast on Stitcher Radio , Google Play, and Apple podcasts!

Thank you SO much for stopping by. God bless, keep and make His face to shine upon you as you #StayOnTheWall!

Love,

BCU

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Singles Chalkboard: Silliness=captivity.

Hey there BCU Family!

Typically, you have the option of listening to our podcast, reading the notes or both. For this post, because of the interview format, please tune into the podcast recording and refer to the written post for the highlights. We pray the post blesses and encourages you. If so, please thumbs up AND leave a comment! Thank you and enjoy the post!

Podcast highlights:

  • God has blessed all mankind, but especially women with attributes like knowledge, tenacity and virtue (See Proverbs 31:9-31).
  • Very often, women can be beguiled into saying and doing things that do not line up with the Word of God (See Genesis 3).
  • Because we serve a wise God, He wants women to walk in the wisdom, knowledge, instruction and understanding that He gives us.
  • So, we must understand not only what a silly woman is, but what to look out for, so we do not fall for the “okie-doke”.
  • We also want to be sure we are not walking in the ungodly attributes Paul lists in 2 Timothy 3.
  • Previously, we the why of the post along with verses 1 & 2. Then we took an in-depth look at verse 3 and then onto verse 4. Let’s take a look at verses 5 and 6!

Scripture references

2 Timothy Chapter 3 (KJV)

1 This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come.

2 For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,

3 Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good,

4 Traitors, heady, high-minded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;

5 Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.

6 For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts,

7 Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.

8 Now as Jannes and Jambres withstood Moses, so do these also resist the truth: men of corrupt minds, reprobate concerning the faith.

9 But they shall proceed no further: for their folly shall be manifest unto all men, as their’s also was.

So BCU Family, I have to confess that this subject is not one that is comfortable. No one wants to be or admit that they are silly–it can feel like an putting down of women, if not viewed in the right way.  Truth be told, when we look at the news, around the lives of our friends and family and even ourselves, many women have been or are are still being held captive.

The point is we do not HAVE to be silly, do not have to be held captive, if we follow what the Word of God says over our flesh. Is that easy and always feel good? No. Is it better that getting into situations that continually cripple and hurt us emotionally, spiritually, mentally, financially and physically? Yes. What are your thoughts?  Please head down to the comments section to share your thoughts so we can continue our conversation!

In the meantime, if you have not subscribed to BlenCouragesU.com, please do so! It’s free and a good place to get the encouragement, inspiration and information based the Word of God! Additionally, you can also see what we are up to on Facebook, Twitter,  and Instagram! You can also listen in and subscribe to the podcast on Stitcher Radio , Google Play, and Apple podcasts!

Thank you SO much for stopping by. God bless, keep and make His face to shine upon you as you #StayOnTheWall!

Love,

BCU

BlenCouragesU1 Comment

Singles Chalkboard: Recognize these characteristics in a man? RUN!

Hey there BCU Family!

Typically, you have the option of listening to our podcast, reading the notes or both. For this post, because of the interview format, please tune into the podcast recording and refer to the written post for the highlights. We pray the post blesses and encourages you. If so, please thumbs up AND leave a comment! Thank you and enjoy the post!

Podcast highlights:

  • God has blessed all mankind, but especially women with attributes like knowledge, tenacity and virtue (See Proverbs 31:9-31).
  • Very often, women can be beguiled into saying and doing things that do not line up with the Word of God (See Genesis 3).
  • Because we serve a wise God, He wants women to walk in the wisdom, knowledge, instruction and understanding that He gives us.
  • So, we must understand not only what a silly woman is, but what to look out for, so we do not fall for the “okie-doke”.
  • We also want to be sure we are not walking in the ungodly attributes Paul lists in 2 Timothy 3.
  • Previously, we the why of the post along with verses 1 & 2. Then we took an in-depth look at verse 3. This time, we will cover verse 4.

Scripture references

2 Timothy Chapter 3 (KJV)

1 This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come.

2 For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,

3 Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good,

4 Traitors, heady, high-minded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;

5 Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.

6 For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts,

7 Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.

8 Now as Jannes and Jambres withstood Moses, so do these also resist the truth: men of corrupt minds, reprobate concerning the faith.

9 But they shall proceed no further: for their folly shall be manifest unto all men, as their’s also was.

So BCU Family, how has this study enlightened you on these characteristics many of us knew, but maybe had not thought too much of? I can tell you for me—TOTAL eye opener!  Please head down to the comments section to share your thoughts so we can continue our conversation!

In the meantime, if you have not subscribed to BlenCouragesU.com, please do so! It’s free and a good place to get the encouragement, inspiration and information based the Word of God! Additionally, you can also see what we are up to on Facebook, Twitter,  and Instagram! You can also listen in and subscribe to the podcast on Stitcher Radio , Google Play, and Apple podcasts!

Thank you SO much for stopping by. God bless, keep and make His face to shine upon you as you #StayOnTheWall!

Love,

BCU

BlenCouragesU2 Comments

BCU Q&A: Effective ministering in tough situations.

Hey 👋🏾 there BCU Family!

As usual, you have the option of listening to our podcast (click the BCU avatar below to listen), reading the notes or BOTH. In any case, we pray the post blesses you. If so, please thumbs up or leave a comment! Thank you and enjoy the post!

So BCU Fam, a wonderful listener sent in a question this week, that I was led to post about this week. Here it is:

Q. “How to you minister to someone who has been Holy Ghost filled, yet they don’t feel free after walking in the Lord a while?”

How do you help them, when the scripture, if the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed (John 8:36), does not help them or somehow they find it hard to rest on that scripture?

  • Do we put them down and call them faithless?
  • Do we tell them they don’t believe God [take Him at] His word?
  • Do we make them feel less than?
  • Do we avoid them all together and say “I’ll leave them to God!”
  • All these things [knowing they need to do what God says], the person may be well aware of.. so, how do they really get help?
  • Or is there any help for them?

Wow, I thank God for the individual who sent this question in! First, let’s deal with the person who is ministering.

In any situation Holy-Ghost filled believers encounter with believer or non-believers, we should be walking in the Spirit versus walking in the flesh (Galatians 5:25). As we walk the way Christ is directing, we’ll remember that all we come in contact with is our neighbor (see Luke 10:27-37),  and we are to love them as ourselves (Galatians 5:14).

That said, in this case, love may come in a loving rebuke/correction as God directs us,  but operating in the love God gives will never set out to intentionally make someone feel badly,  ignore them or self-righteously say, “God will deal with them!” Those attitudes and treatments are rooted in pride.

Pride tells us to manipulate people by name-calling, avoiding, side-eyeing or half-hugs thereby “punishing” the individual who isn’t behaving how we would like. What that does is discourage the individual, besmirch your Christian witness and sets you up for chastening for mishandling someone made in God’s own image (see Genesis 1:27 and James 3:9).  Let’s be prayerful and ask God to help us to react the HE wants us to, versus spouting off cutting remarks and behaving unscripturally.

Next, let’s understand the individual we’re ministering to more and look at the Scripture referenced by the listener in a bit more context. In John 8, Jesus was talking with the Jewish people, of whom some believed, but many did not–and they were questioning Him. Take a look at the conversation.

31 Then said Jesus to those Jews which believed on him, If ye continue in my word, then are ye my disciples indeed;
32 And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.
33 They answered him, We be Abraham’s seed, and were never in bondage to any man: how sayest thou, Ye shall be made free?
34 Jesus answered them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Whosoever commits sin is the servant of sin.
35  And the servant abideth not in the house for ever: but the Son abides ever.
36  If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed.

We see here that Jesus came to set the servants of sin (all of us) free from sin. So as we look at the question posed, it sounds like this Holy Ghost filled person may not be continuing in the Word of God (verse 31) and choosing truth (verse 32). Rather this individual is choosing to be in bondage and enslaved to sin (verses 33 and 34), and voiding abiding in the Son and the freedom Jesus provides.  ‘

Did you notice the emphasis on the word “choosing?” Does it sound harsh? Or maybe you’re thinking, “He can’t help it” or “But, she’s been through so much already”. I agree, he can’t help it. She sure has been through some serious tests. That’s why we need Jesus down on the inside (the Holy Ghost) to help us help it, and to comfort and  guide us as we go through.  This, along with good biblical teaching, study, prayer, fasting and Christian fellowship, helps us we to hear and recognize the voice of the Lord and continue in (hearing and doing) His Word.

Please note, having the Holy Ghost does not automatically stop us from sinning, we will always have free-will to make whatever choices we desire. God wants us to love Him more than the sin, so we should choose to obey Him. In this case, either the person is willfully and actively choosing to walk in bondage to sin, or passively allowing the sin to take over and yielding to it. Either way, it’s a fleshly choice contrary to the will of God and there is a consequence (verse 35a). Now that we understand that better, let’s look into ministering effectively.

Really, we can loop back to the first paragraph where we should be prayerful, listen and respond with exactly God is telling us to say at the time (walking the the Spirit and on kairos mode). This is done without expressing your opinion, being puffed up, or being guided by your emotions. If the person doesn’t respond immediately to what was said, or turns back to the bondage, we still want to LOVE them. Love doesn’t mean you agree, condone or support what the person is doing/ not doing, yet love continues to treat the individual with long-suffering and kindness (I Corinthians 13), as we pray until the Lord works on the heart of the person in His way and on His timing.

Bottom line: God’s love and mercy was and is still continuously extended to us in so many areas, as His disciples, we are admonished to show that love and mercy to others, along with correction, as prescribed by God. This way, God is glorified, the person is edified, the enemy is horrified and you, BCU Family member, gratified to continue in the Word of God as a good and faithful disciple and servant of our King. Amen?! Amen!

Let’s talk: What’s your reaction to our reader’s question? What advice would you give? Please drop us a line in the comments section below and we’ll continue the conversation!

As a reminder, if you have not subscribed to BlenCouragesU.com, please do so! It’s free and a good place to get the encouragement, inspiration and information based the Word of God! Additionally, you can also see what we are up to on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, and now YouTube! You can also listen in and subscribe to the podcast on Stitcher Radio , Google Play, and Apple podcasts!

Thank you SO much for stopping by. God bless, keep and make His face to shine upon you as you #StayOnTheWall!

Love,

BCU

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